Rick
Rick
I’ll tell you how I feel about school, Jerry: It’s a waste of time. Bunch of people runnin’ around bumpin’ into each other, got a guy up front says “2 + 2,” and the people in the back say, “4.” Then the bell rings and they give you a carton of milk and a piece of paper that says you can go take a dump or somethin’. I mean, it’s not a place for smart people, Jerry. I know that’s not a popular opinion, but that’s my two cents on the issue.
Mr. Meeseeks
Mr. Meeseeks
Having a family doesn’t mean that you stop being an individual. You know the best thing you can do for the people that depend on you? Be honest with them, even if it means setting them free.
Rick
Rick
Listen, I’m not the nicest guy in the Universe because I’m the smartest. And being nice is something stupid people do to hedge their bets. Now, I haven’t been exactly subtle about how little I trust marriage. I couldn’t make it work, and I could turn a black hole into a sun, so at a certain point, you’ve got to ask yourself what are the odds this is legit and not just some big lie we’re all telling ourselves because we’re afraid to die alone? Because, you know, that’s exactly how we all die … alone. But … but … Here’s the thing. Birdperson is my best friend, and if he loves Tammy, well, then I love Tammy, too. [Cheers and applause] To friendship, to love, and to my greatest adventure yet … opening myself up to others.
Rick
Rick
Listen, Morty, I hate to break it to you but what people call "love" is just a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed. It hits hard, Morty, then it slowly fades, leaving you stranded in a failing marriage. I did it. Your parents are gonna do it. Break the cycle, Morty. Rise above. Focus on science